Frodo Potter and the fellowship of the Phoenix
by Aranel Potter
Summary: In short Harry finds out that he has been lied to all his life, he is really a hobbit (explains the height thing I suppose)
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer- we don't own Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter or anything else which looks familiar we just borrow them.  
  
This is a chain story between BexPotter (of Harry Potter stories) and Aranel-elf (of Lord of the Rings Stories.) It's obscure indeed but for anyone who knows either of us (okay if you know one of us it's likely you know the other but anyway!) its probably quite normal. Some of the chapters are very short indeed so I'll join them up on one posting.  
  
BexPotter Chapter One  
  
One day Harry Potter was walking in the woods of Mirkwood, which were known, to the Hogwarts students as the Forbidden Forest. In the wood was a magic tree which if you climbed to the top you were in middle earth Harry had no idea how this worked as they were in top earth and if you climbed up you wouldn't be in Middle Earth but above top Earth. Hermione had told him to stop thinking about stupid things and get on with his homework but that was Hermione for you always concerned about Schoolwork. Harry thought the stuff she was talking about was stupid how could the earth rise to meet an object in the middle if you dropped it, it would be a giant bouncy castle.  
  
Harry came to a clearing and who should appear but Sirius Black.  
  
"Harry I have something to tell you my name isn't Sirius Black but Aragorn son of Arathorn I have been here in disguise I come from middle earth, so does Dumbledore he's real name is Gandalf and Ron is Sam and Hagrid is really a dwarf called Gimli."  
  
Harry interrupted him "How can Hagrid be a dwarf."  
  
"Don't question me okay McGonaggall is called Arwen and I am secretly in love with her, Hermione is well actually Hermione is just Hermione but we can't leave her out same with Moony really, oh and Lockhart is Boromir and Snape well Snape is really an elf called Legolas. Oh and you Harry are called Frodo and you are to come oin a mission with me to destroy the evil dark Curtain ring no wait that is a curtain ring I'm holding I mean the evil one ring."  
  
Harry stood there with his mouth hanging open and said  
  
"Okay I kinda got lost after Harry I have something to tell you so can we start again please."  
  
Thanks for reading now could you kinda review. 


	2. Chapter two

Okay chapter two.  
  
Aranel-Elf  
  
"Snape? How on earth can he be a fantastic heart-throb of a blond elf??" Harry was confused. He had seen the movie, Lord of the Rings, and had quite fallen in love with a certain elf, and was contemplating his sexuality. This just put a whole new twist on those shimmering cauldrons, and their intoxicatingly sweet fumes....  
  
"The thing is" said Sirius "He had to have a suitable cover up - it was hell for him, not being able to wash his hair! Just imagine, one of the cleanest things on earth not being able to wash..." Harry wanted to stop imagining, right now. His mind, combined with Sirius', was not exactly helping him with the sexuality issue. His mind started to wander onto fouler things, when he was struck by an idea. (Boy, that's got to hurt!)  
  
"So if there all the good things, what about the Balrogs and orcs...and...And well, all that stuff?"  
  
"The Balrogs, well, that reminds me of an interesting anecdote. You see, there is nothing worse then a balrog with wind - it just simply blows you away---" His words were cut short from a noise below them.  
  
"Shnookums?Are you up there, my darling sweetie pie?"  
  
BexPotter  
  
From the other side of the clearing came McGonnagall in a way Harry had never seen her before he suddenly found himself thinking about his sexuality more than he had before. She was dressed in white with a necklace round her neck, She walked over to where Sirius was standing and pulled him into a passionate kiss, Harry stood there not knowing where to look and when they eventually came up for Air half an hour later McGonnagall just vanished.  
  
"Harry come with me and we will go to Middle Earth and I will go to some where and you will er go to some where else I suppose." He climbed up the tree and like Mcgonaggal vanished Harry followed Noticing that as he walked closer to the tree he seemed to shrink and he had a sudden urge for a plate of mushrooms and a cigar.  
  
Thanks for reading please review. 


	3. Chapter Three

Okay part three  
  
Aranel- elf  
  
The urge for mushrooms was willing him forward, but the notion that he didn't know what he was getting into was holding him back. I mean, why does the curtain ring need to move from where it really was? Couldn't it just stay in Dumbledore's office for the rest of eternity? But then a reason came to him as to why he should go: how would he know whether he was supposed to be gay or straight if he didn't confront it in the form of sexy Snape? He tentatively climbed the tree and stuck one hand through the swirling pink portal. Then another thought came to him: he could be free of the most annoying girl in the universe, Hermione! As he jumped through the portal, he heard a familiar voice, screaming 'Harry, don't do it' and a hand on the back of his robes. Damn Hermione, always showing up where she wasn't wanted.  
  
BexPotter (Be prepared for some of the shortest chapters in existance)  
  
Harry ran to the tree and climbed up and suddenly all was dark...  
  
Aranel- Elf  
  
but he could see  
  
BexPotter  
  
Something.....  
  
God that was short wasn't it and people complain my normal chapters are short. 


	4. Chapter 4

Aranel something.... could be heard creeping from the bushes. Hermione started to whimper into Harry's ear. Suddenly a huge spider resembling that of Aragog jumped out at them, waving its pincers with madness in its eyes. Hermione screamed. Harry grabbed her hand, and tried to run. But it was no use. The giant thing was gaining on them. Harry tripped on a tree root, pulling Hermione down with him to almost certain death. But instead of fiery pain leaping up his skin as sharp pincers connected with his legs, he felt nothing. He unscrewed his tightly clenched eyes, and looked upwards. Behind a blindingly beautiful figure was the dead spider, arrows through its eyes. Harry cast his gaze back to the figure. No, it was impossible. Something that was once so ugly could never become this beautiful, handsome. Could it?  
  
"Harry. I understand that Aragorn has told you everything?" His voice was soft and lilting. "I must get you to my father. Are you hurt?" Harry could barely mumble a reply - he was so astounded that Snape was being nice to him! But then, it wasn't really Snape. Snape never really existed.  
  
"I'm fine. Hermione was knocked unconscious by the fall."  
  
"I know you are afraid, young one, but all will be well."  
  
Harry nodded. He got up and brushed the dead leaves from his school robes, watching the amazing creature lift Hermione as is she were no weight at all.  
  
"Is it true that you have..."  
  
In response to the unfinished question, Legolas Greenleaf son of Thranduil heir to the throne of Mirkwood lifted his hair. "Yep, pointy ears. And their not made from gelatine. Come, Aragorn is waiting for us in the next clearing." "How can you tell he is waiting?"  
  
"How can you not tell? He smells bad" 


End file.
